Saturday, February 12, 2011


I often wonder what it would have been like to have a sister. Despite being 'stuck' in the middle, I love my brothers; and I of course know that gender is not something you can choose :-) There are just times that I could use some sisterly advice or chit-chats, and they aren't there.

Although, thanks to my brothers and my hubby, I have four wonderful sisters-in-law. Two are the same age as me (my older brother's wife, and hubby's sister), and the other two are 4 years younger (my younger brother's wife), and 6 years younger (hubby's sister). I feel closer to my hubby's sisters, probably because we spend more time together. The relationship with my hubby's youngest sister has had its ups and downs, but we've always been fairly close. I think my relationship with his other sister grew a bit stronger after she had her son nearly two years ago. Both being mothers, there is always something to talk about! I've known my older brothers wife since they started dating in 1994 and I've known my younger brother's wife for about 5 years. They are both mothers, so it is nice when the family gets together to be able to have that common bond.

I feel like the odd-ball. Out of all 4 sisters-in-law, I am the only one that doesn't have a sister. My hubby is in the same situation, out of 3 brothers-in-law, he is the only one that doesn't have a brother. Maybe that is why we connect so well most of the time. He grew up with sisters, I grew up with brothers. I understand him, he understands me.

I have female friends who have sisters, and I can see from them that it is such a different type of relationship than any that I have experienced. It's something that I can sit and think about, but never with any understanding.

Growing up I had a few close female friends, but I tended to befriend males more easily. I think having two brothers may have had something to do with that. I just felt more comfortable with friends of the opposite sex. That is another whole blog entry for another time, but I don't think I ever "learned" how to have a sisterly relationship with someone, like I probably could have.

The closest I have to a sister, is my best friend in Finland. We became pen-pals in 1992, so for nearly 19 years we've developed a close friendship.  She has 3 younger brothers, so we are the sisters each other never had :-) I've made my dream-come-true twice, visiting Finland in 2002 and 2010. My most recent visit was almost completely different than my first trip (we are both married, and have children now) but it was amazing! My Finnish family and friends are great. One of the things that didn't change was feeling the closeness of having a sister. Even if just for a few weeks, the opportunity to travel, hang out, chat, shop, etc... with a "sister" is like no other.

Is it weird that I wonder what it is like to have a sister? Why do I even try to think about it? Does anyone else ever think about this? It's something I will never fully comprehend.

I think deep down I need to get out more, and get away from being a mother, a wife, a housekeeper, even if for just a few hours. Time to propose the idea of a sisters (in-law) night!

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